I’m a black-and-white kind of person, especially when it comes to making decisions. I want to make sure, to the best of my knowledge, that it’s a good decision before I commit to it. I like to sleep on it—the bigger the decision, the more nights I prefer to ponder it. Then, throughout the day, I’ll ruminate on it some more. I hate having to make expedient decisions on major issues just as much as I detest crawling into the crawl space beneath my home with the mice, spiders, and who knows what else.

One of these kinds of decisions had to be made when we bought the house I’m currently in. It seemed like a good fit when we toured it, but as is customary for me, I wanted time to “think” on it. Time I didn’t have; another offer was on the table. The clock was ticking. Time crunches are not in my comfort zone! Within a couple of hours (my eyes tightly squinted and my jaw clenched), we gave an offer. This is the only time I can remember making such a rapid decision on a spur-of-the-moment basis. I’m happy to report that the purchase turned out well, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t holding my breath the entire time.

Just this month, I was given a different perspective on making these kinds of important decisions. In Chris Tiegreen’s devotional entitled Hearing His Voice, he begins one entry by talking about Abram. The Lord said to Abram, “Leave your country, your relatives, and your father’s house, and go to the land that I will show you” (Genesis 12:1). So Abram departed as the Lord had instructed him (verse 4). There’s no mention that Abram had to think about it or sleep on it. He didn’t question whether it was really God who had spoken, and he didn’t shrug it off. He just went with it. He had faith to believe it would work out.

It made me wonder how many times I may have thought I heard God but didn’t have enough faith to go with it. Instead, I wanted to ponder, weigh all the pros and cons, and then fell into that trap of dead uncertainty, failing to move forward.

Chris Tiegreen goes on to say, “If we want to hear God’s voice, we need to understand that He will not speak so definitely that no faith is required to follow.” Why hadn’t I figured this out before? Of course God would want us to show we had faith in Him. What I was really showing was that I had a fear of acting on faith.

I don’t anticipate that I will ever be the sort who enjoys making hurried decisions, but I will hesitate and ask myself if this is a decision I’m afraid to make because I’m reluctant to trust in God. If that’s the case, then that’s what I need to spend time pondering.

Until next time, keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin’.

---

My uncle found an old upright piano sitting in a barn. It was in pretty good shape for the company it kept. My aunt and uncle didn’t have children, but Uncle Cliff’s niece came to mind. She needed a piano; her grandmother on the other side of the family was a piano teacher after all. With all those free lessons she had the potential to become a concert pianist. And that’s how that haunting black monster came to my house. My mother didn’t like the look of it, either. She tore into that thing and after many months transformed it into a warm cinnamon- honey color. The color now gave it a welcoming appeal, but I wasn’t fooled.

I imagine my grandma wanted me to be the best student she ever had, but I’m quite sure I was the worst. Whenever I sat down on that disgustingly hard piano bench my thoughts began to taunt me. What can I say? I’m an outdoorsy kind of girl at heart.  It didn’t help that I could see my brother out the window digging fishworms and tossing them into the red coffee can we used when heading to the creek. The kitchen timer Mom had turned to 30 minutes wasn’t even moving.   

When I turned 70 this past July, I began having different kinds of thoughts. Thoughts of wishing I had paid attention when Grandma was trying her darndest to advance me beyond Thompson’s beginner’s books. I even mentioned to my Youth Group (a mixed Bible study group of which I’m the youngest – named as a joke) that I was toying with the idea of getting a keyboard. One friend in the group graciously offered to let me borrow hers to try out for a while to see if I liked it.

I found I did enjoy having my friend’s keyboard and decided I would watch for a nice used one on Marketplace. A few days before I was to return my friend’s instrument, another friend in my Youth Group called and asked if I was still interested in getting a keyboard. “I sure am,” I said. “I’m watching for one to pop up on Marketplace.”

“I have a deal for you. A woman I sit beside in the choir at the Senior Center asked me if I knew of anyone wanting a nice keyboard,” Jan said. “She wants to give it away to someone that would use it.”

Wow! Do I feel blessed! Psalms 115:13 says: He will bless those who fear the Lord – small and great alike.  It occurred to me that God does care about even the smallest details in our lives and wants to bless us with things that bring joy.  We only need to be mindful of where the gifts come from and be thankful.  James 1:17 says: every good and perfect gift comes from above. I have no doubt His hand was in this.

I’ll never be a concert pianist, but I may get polished enough to play and sing along with the hymns in my old red hymn book. In my mind I see Grandma smiling with a grateful song in her heart.

Until next time…keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin’.

Can you remember when you first memorized the ABCs? Or how about the times tables, the Pledge of Allegiance, or the Lord’s Prayer? Over time, we’ve memorized songs, poems, and famous movie quotes. With occasional review, these memories stay with us for a lifetime.

Research shows that memorization benefits cognitive function in many ways—it improves focus, lays the foundation for higher-level thinking, enhances recall speed, boosts confidence, and even helps delay cognitive decline in older adults. The more you memorize, the better your brain becomes at recalling information across various contexts.

I often hear people claim their brains just aren’t wired for memorization. That’s when I ask if they can recite the ABCs or recall what 7 x 8 equals. Sure, memorization might take longer as we get older. According to Harvard Health, most people begin to notice memory changes in their 50s and 60s when processing speed slows down. But that doesn’t mean memorization is impossible—it just takes longer, and that’s okay. We have more time at seventy than we did at thirty!

Memorization isn’t just helpful in the physical world, but in the spiritual one as well. In Ephesians 6, we are urged to put on the armor of God so that we can stand firm against the devil. Verse 12 reminds us that our struggle isn’t against flesh and blood, but against the evil forces in the unseen world. And in verse 17, we are told to take up the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. When Satan attacks, one of our best defenses is to use Scripture in response—just as Jesus did when tempted by Satan in the wilderness (Matthew 4:1-11).

How beneficial it is to have Scripture stored in our hearts so we can speak it immediately in times of need. As Max Lucado says, “Load your pistol with scriptures and keep your finger on the trigger.”

Until next time, keep your ammo ready. Keep on readin’, and I’ll keep on writin’.

As a young nurse, with only six months of experience under my belt, we moved to the small town of Cozad, Nebraska. I applied at the twenty-bed hospital, starting almost immediately on the night shift. I soon learned, as the only RN in the building, that things were going to be a lot different from the six floor hospital in Lincoln, Nebraska. As I remember, there wasn’t much of an orientation. It was more like an introduction. “DeLila, meet Velma and Marilyn. They have both worked here a long time and they will be your full-time aids. They should be able to answer most any question you have.” It’s true, they had a lot of experience but aids can’t start IV’s, insert catheters, place nasogastric tubes, or do OB checks – all things I wasn’t very experienced at. Back at Bryan Memorial there had been at least three RN’s to every floor on the night shift as well as a supervisor with a pager on her hip roaming the floors and helping out where needed.

This Cozad Hospital was a different world. Not only was I responsible for however many patients we had, but also for the Emergency Room, the ICU (which was one bed behind big glass windows next to the nurse’s station), and any OB patient that might come in and deliver. Some nights were slow; some were crazy wild.

Over the course of the year I became quite efficient in IV sticks, catheter insertions, NG placements, and yes…even OB checks. It didn’t happen all at once, but with each positive experience I grew less anxious and more sure of myself. I had come a long way from that first week when I was less than convinced I could do the job.

I’m not the only one that’s ever wrestled with doubt and insecurities. When God told Moses he was to lead the Israelites out of Egypt Moses replied, “But who am I to appear before Pharoah? How can you expect me to lead the Israelites out of Egypt?” (Exodus 3:11) Moses’s insecurities manifested in excuses why he couldn’t do what God was asking. (Believe me Moses…I can identify.) We know, with God’s persuasion, that Moses did end up leading the people out of Egypt. And what a job it was to lead two-million bickering and complaining people around in the desert for forty years. The thing that saved Moses, was that God had promised to be with him, and He was. And just like Moses, God was with me too. He is with everyone of us that places his faith in Him. Psalm 16:8 says it simply this way: I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. So many times, I would have been shaking had it not been that I believed God was with me. I envisioned Him sitting right next to me the night I started my first IV on a child – a seven year old girl with dark hair and brown eyes. I prayed fervently while gathering my supplies that she would remain calm and I would too. Just prior to making the stick I said, “Amy, you may want to turn your head away.” She was having nothing to do with that. She watched me intently, never flinching. I made the stick and blood started flowing back into the tubing, telling me I was in. Amy surprised me when she said, “That is so cool!”  Once I finished taping things in place, I gave her a hug and assured her I wished every adult patient was as calm as she was when getting an IV. Thankfully that first experience for both of us went well. But there were other times when I failed on the first or second attempts (sometimes even more) to get IV’s in, catheters inserted, and nasogastric tubes placed. Because I had no one to “save me”, I had no other recourse but to try a different approach.  Either way, my confidence increased.

Now retired, (after thousands of IV sticks, catheter insertions and nasograstic placements) I no longer worry about preforming nursing duties efficiently, but there’s other things to learn in this season of life. When I find myself in the midst of a new experience or an unfamiliar job, I do what I learned to do so many years ago…pray, acknowledge that God is right here with me, and appreciate that I’ll either perform well or learn a different approach.

Until next time…keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin’.

This week I read an article about the consequences of self-inflicted actions. It brought several thoughts to mind. One, being that I am thankful I am in the “well-seasoned” era of my life where I have learned that what we do today may greatly affect what our tomorrow looks like. We don’t always have to speak our minds or act on our emotions when it’s detrimental to others and ourselves. And then of course, the article stirred a memory of a situation years ago when I did just that. Without going into a lot of detail, just let me say that I let my tongue wag with unwholesome talk that tore down instead of building up. (Ephesians 4:9)  I would have been wise to have zipped it. Later, I found out from a mutual friend that the consequences could have been much worse than they were. The person I had spoken out against verbalized her intentions to take me to court. She had the money to do it and much more influence in the community than I did.  What a mess that could have been if our friend had not diffused the situation. Although she did not make good on her threat, I still wished I had done things differently.

There are many other examples of self-inflicted painful consequences that may not be as severe but still impact our daily lives. For example – have you ever stepped out on icy sidewalks with smooth soled shoes, only to fall? Maybe, you’ve had serious car repairs because you didn’t keep up on regular oil changes. Have you put so much on your credit card that it now seems you’ll never be out of debt? Maybe you failed to repaint the deck when you knew you should have, and now the boards are rotting. All examples of self-inflicted consequences that could have been avoided if things had been done differently.  

In my case, when I’ve done things I knew could have been avoided, I find it hard to ask for help. Afterall, did I not deserve it?  Shouldn’t I lie by myself in the bed I made?  Besides, who’s really going to want to help me when they know it’s my own stupidity, stubbornness, or outright procrastination that got me into this dilemma?

 There is one we can always go to. God invites us to come to Him, no matter what we’ve done or didn’t do. I Peter 5:7 encourages us to cast all our cares upon Him with no mention of conditions. And Isaiah 58:9 says – then you shall call, and the Lord will answer; you shall cry, and He will say, ‘Here I am.’ Again, without conditions. I am so thankful for a God who loves me unconditionally no matter what unthoughtful or stupid thing I’ve done.

Until next time – “keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin’.